Skip to content

Decipher the message a grumpy co-worker is sending you

Q: “I have a co-worker who is very moody. Whenever I ask about one of her projects or suggest a way to do things more efficiently, ‘Andrea’ gets snippy and starts muttering under her breath. If I ask what’s wrong, she replies, ‘Nothing,’ then has a bad attitude for at least an hour. How can I confront her about her attitude problem?”  Aggravated Co-worker

Are you a Level 4 listener?

If you want to influence people and effectively persuade them to embrace your ideas and follow your lead, you need to start by becoming an excellent listener, say Mark Goulston and John Ullmen, authors of Real Influence: Persuade Without Pushing and Gain Without Giving In. They identify four levels of listening.

Cut the constant ‘I’

Only begin a sentence with “I” if you’re talking about yourself. It sounds obvious, but it’s a rule that’s rarely followed. Leading off with “I’m concerned that” or “I believe” when your point is more about other people or issues is a mistake that can make you seem more self-centered than you really are.